December 13th

 

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Good Morning God.  I’ve been reading some books about people who have had near death experiences (NDE’s).  What I found interesting is that from those experiences they discovered what I have discovered from my writing with you – without an NDE, that we are One with you and everything.  But the more I have been thinking about it, I guess I did have my own NDE.  I am am kind of embarrassed to admit it, but I was deeply suicidal.  And I guess it was from that state of truly being on the edge of leaving this earth that it made room for me to hear you.  So here’s our first conversation – from September, 2002.  It is still very powerful and came from a state of complete surrender.  I’m glad I am still here, now that I am living with you (excerpt from my book):
 
“One day, in a state of searching, confusion, angst and resistance, I sat down on my living room floor, arms and legs crossed, and said: “OK God, I’m done.  I’m leaving unless you tell me why I’m here.” (I’m sure God knew this was a veiled threat, as I wouldn’t hurt my parents by killing myself.  But it was true that I was done with living my life as it had been).  At this point I felt called to pick up my journal and I began to write:
 
‘God, what do you want me to do?!’
I experienced a soundless awareness that seemed beyond thought and watched my hand write:
 
“Nothing, Diane.”
(Now I’m feeling suspicious and incredulous and in my head saying yeah, right.)
 
“Yes, that is the message. You don’t HAVE to DO anything.  You can sit under a tree for the rest of your life.  Your depression comes from your belief that you have to do something.  Well you don’t.  Focus on fun,  joy and love.  From there, your joyous action is My love in motion!


Love,
God”

 

 

 

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Copyright, Diane Dandeneau, 2013

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